Little do they know i think of them daily
little do they know i pray for them daily
little to they know i care for them still
little do they know that i miss them still
little do they know i look at their pictures
little do they know i have had nightmares of loosing them forever
little do they know i do actually love them
little do they know…
do they even understand?
i feel if they did, they wouldn’t hold me at a distance
i feel they would at least hold a phone call for more than 3 minutes
little do they know, they have hurt me
little do they know that they have hurt themselves the most tho
damage has been done from both sides
not just mine, little do they know.
little do they know i am not struggling as bad as they wished i would
little do they know, i am happier than i was back then
that isnt to say i dont miss them
i wish things didnt happen the way they did.
i look back and wish they had just accepted him.
accepted my life, my love. who i was…
but tradition stepped in the way.
words out of context
throwing words around like dirt in the air
causing me to sputter and cough
burning my eyes, from the tears that resulted
as i would go to sleep at night wishing things were different
wishing that they would just see things from my view
little do they know, i was struggling so much internally
suicidal thoughts were prevalent, like i was out of my mind.
i hated life
i wanted to waste life and be wasted
thats what i attempted that one time… little do they know
i drank to escape. i was miserable little do they know
little do they know, i came back, with more apathy than i can even explain
little do they now, he, my love, was the reason i got better.
encouragement daily he gave me. telling me to keep in trying
negativity should be ignored
let it roll off of me…
i struggled. boy i did. i still do at times
all my life i been susceptible to critical negativity
not intentionally, but it did affect me
it did make me what i was
stressing constantly about relatively everything…
i realize that that isnt the way life should be lived
fearing anything and everything
because if something is perfect, then it is wrong
and if its wrong, then disaster could happen…
that kind of thinking is what got me where i was
i was ready to give up… matter of fact i did
i gave up completely
i decided never to try again. ever
little do they know…
But little do they know, my well-being was saved by him.
he led me to the One above who saved me and made me whole…
he led me to the right path again.
and once i fell, hard, i knew he was the one.
not just because of the attention, little do they know
not just because of the sweet words he spoke, little do they know…
but because of the example he set for me, the model i wanted to be
a strong person
a faithful person
someone who desires God’s will for their life…
i wanted that. i fell in love with that… little do they know
little do they know, i was attracted from the start.
before i even knew him, before i even gave him a chance…
when i would talk about him, negatively, influenced by negativity around me there…
i allowed myself to get sucked in. follow the crowd and speak their language…
little do they know, before i was taken, i noticed him, above all.
attraction at the first, but it didnt go anywhere for i was distracted with a more forward one, that through their eyes was a better guy
well, little do they know, he wasnt by far
worst mistake of my life… little do they know.
but they wouldnt know
i never would let them
for one thing would lead to another and i couldnt trust them
they would force the issue
force things their way in MY life
so i unfortunately had to take matters into mine own hands
and here i am…
reaping what we all sowed
little do they know.
it isnt just me
that sowed this seed.