Tag Archives: music

I Found You

I will admit it

I was ready to give up

Settle for less

Just to be done

I was ready to live in an empty state

Ready to love someone I didn’t love for the rest of my life

Boy, what a mistake

 

I knew you the whole time

And I liked you in the back of my mind

from the start

But I refused to give up what I had my mind set on

I was determined to be done looking

I decided on the lesser to be done searching

 

I would twist things in my mind to make me like you less

And I would take rumors and nonsense spread

And use it to my advantage

Excuse to not like you

To not fall in love with you

 

I knew I had some feeling going on

I felt disloyal to the on I settled for

I felt like a cheater

So I distanced myself more

And I purposed to love the lesser

To forget the greater

 

 

You were the greater

You were the one I wanted from the start

But when you were taken I decided to just keep what I already knew I had

I shouldn’t have

I was just so sick of trying

Sick of aiming higher

When the arrow would just land low

 

I always heard to aim high so you don’t settle for less

But you just seemed too high

And like I said before

I gave up

I was defeated after my last breakup

I was too hurt to be broken again

 

But there I was again

Déjà vu

I reached a point where I didn’t know what to do

Other than give up completely

Drink my problems away

In apathy

I didn’t give a care anymore

I was hurt too much

I needed an escape

 

 

 

 

 

So I risked everything

And did I ever fail

I failed at my testimony

I lost it all

I lost you

And I left you

And now I am alone wishing I could just see you

Tell you in person how much I love you

Show you how much I care about you

 

But I can’t

I am enduring a trial of patience

It is so difficult to keep my head up

Hope is a hard thing for me to believe in

I have too many ups and downs

You told me to keep trying and to have faith

But I never told you these things

And I have a past in my heart

That is hard to depart

From

I would run

From God

From life

From reality

I refused to believe things that was as clear as water

So it all rushed through me

Hit every organ and left me bruised up

 

 

It was all my fault tho

I should’ve listened

I shouldn’t have settled

I shouldn’t have given up

And it this doesn’t work…

I don’t know what I will do.

But know that I love you

More than myself

I would give up anything

And I will do without

Forgive me if I doubt that you believe me when I say that

But I do

For you are my everything

And I only long for the day that I can put action to my words

And prove to you

How much I love you

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Missing Pieces (Original)

This is a love song for the love of my life 🙂 Please comment, share, and enjoy!! Here it is 🙂

Take Me (In The Storm) (Original)

I thought i would share one of my most recent songs… I made this website as an avenue to pour my heart out through poetry, but i also do it through song as well. i hope you enjoy 🙂 leave comments below or even suggestions if you want me to cover a song! Take Me

Addiction

I was reading some of my older posts. And i read this one and realozed it still applies to me. Sometimes when i write at one time i will come back and be like… What was i thinking? Or im glad im not like that anymore… But this is still exactly how i feel.
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Addiction – http://wp.me/p5Zr1y-ef

Addiction

How is it that it controls my being?
Why is it that I can’t survive a day without it?
Why is it so much a part of me?
Like it’s my heartbeat
A required part for my breathing
I dread the days it leaves me
Gasping for air
Heaving
It is my drug
If it dissipates
Withdrawals run through my veins
It’s in my blood
It is a part of my soul
It is me
It completes me and makes me whole
It soothes my anger
It calms me in disaster
It takes me away when I don’t want to live any longer
It pumps me up when times are rough and I need a boost
What would I do?
Without this addiction?
My mood may never be soothed,
Smoothed,
Renewed…
From the ruffles
And struggles
That form over time
That come into my life
When I am overcome with the nostalgia of the past
Things I don’t want to remember that can’t be taken back
Things that I wish never crossed my mind
And things that I know will fade over time
But I can’t help but relinquish the fact it can’t be taken back
And that regret and pain is where it’s at
That’s where the struggles are
It’s from those things that I have my scars
And even though I am bound by chains of penance
This thing
This addiction
Cures it
It makes me forget why I relent it
But it is a temporary heal
It only last for a few minutes
So the need for more and more of this drug
Has become more and more a necessity
I can’t stop now
It is a part of me
And I wish that others can see
That I am not crazy
And this thing isn’t a monste
It is something that I am attached to
Like a bear cub and its mother
When predators attack and that cub is hurt
That mother comes and violently kills all the perverts
That spit at the cub
And give their hate speech
Leaving that cub to fall on its back
Losing a grip of the earth under its feet
When will it end?
All the torment
When will I live again?
Without having to shoot this drug into my body
When will I breathe again?
Without a cord running into me
When will I begin to be happy? When?
When!?
Today?
No.
Today is gone and over with?
Tomorrow?
No. I am too addicted
Next week?
Next month?
Next year?
When?
Never…
Because that drug is what keeps me alive

What If

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What if?

Don’t let someone determine the outcome of your life. Life knocks you down? You just get back up and move forward… A man once said, “Well what if that someone that knocked you down was the only thing you knew? And the only thing you knew wasn’t there to help you back up to your feet? Now your a changed person and it’s not a good change. Your heart is set to stone and the only place you know as home is the floor you sleep on at night. You feel like it’s the closes thing you have because your body is close to the floor.” Well where’s the man that told you life is going to knock you down, where is he now? Is he helping you back to your feet is he helping you move forward in your life. No he’s not. And sometimes the only faith you have and the only faith you believe in will leave you….. But what if this is a test? What if the man that told you “when life knocks you down to get back up”, hasn’t left your side and hasn’t forgot about you. What if, he’s seeing if your strong enough to go though the test that life gives you, even tho his people broke you down and made you feel like a misfit in this big world we call home?  What if? -by Brendan Fitzsimmons

This is one of my very best friends writing. He inspires me all the time and I hope this inspires you. He has a YouTube channel also. Subscribe to him! https://youtu.be/i-7c43cVFWQ

Freedom

There is freedom in music.
Music is an escape.
The cadence to the ears that gives one peace,
Like a drug – for therapy.
Six strings strummed,
And a melodic hum,
Work as a blanket on a cold day,
Warming the soul in a magical way.

There is freedom in poetry.
Another way of escape is by writing.
Anything from love to hate,
Regret and sorrowful remembrance,
To happiness and forgiveness.
The topics are endless.
The only limit is creativeness.

There is freedom in sleep.
An escape when one is weak.
(Exhaustion from the world)
The brutal reality, that stabs us when we aren’t looking.
Things too real are my enemy;
So I cherish what is fake,
Because the truth is hard to follow.
My throat closes up before the pill can be swallowed,
But my eyes and my ears,
They pry my mouth open
And force the proof down my throat,
As if it were a garbage disposal.
I gag hoping to throw up
The poison shoved in to my gut.
Yes. The poison is truth.
And the truth is like poison.
This is why we run from it.
Making excuses of it and hiding it.
The truth exposes insecurities;
The truth exposes reality.
Reality is what we hate to see.
This is why we stay submerged in all things technology.
But what we fail to realize is It’s the poison.
technology is the deadly tool we think is freedom.
Oh yeah. Well it is freedom.
Freedom full of lies –
A tool of the Prince to be a disguise;
To blind our eyes from the truth beyond the sky.
We are too caught up in things we carry around.
How about we look around
To see what can be done
To see what we’ve become.
A generation caught up in pleasure
Not focused on pleasing the maker…

There is freedom in truth
Its true that we all want proof
But is portraying lies what we really want to do?
Living a lie is unnecessary
For lies are told everyday
We see it on TV
and by the words we say.
We wonder when will it stop?
Never.
It will never stop.
Not until the end has begun
And the lies will be proven wrong
And truth will overcome.

There is freedom in expectation;
Anticipating the coming;
Hoping and longing
For the coming of the King.
There is freedom in the salvation He brings.