Back in the Beginning

You can’t always follow your heart, for it leads to destruction.

However, I followed mine,and it lead to happiness and love.

Still protected, still held close, my heart is big enough, yet taken for granted.

I give and give, piece by piece,

To be kept forever.

“Forgive and forget”, “turn the other cheek”,

“Remember what God did for you and do the same, for where would you be without His forgiving name?” No shame, no shame, 

No pain no gain,

Take all the blame.

Love everything and everyone the same.

Want to gain a friend?

Take a risk.

Want to gain trust?

Take the punch.

Want to gain freedom?

Leave all you ever known.

And I once again, I am, back in the beginning.

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Anomaly

whats tradition?

glorified repetition?

i want a new way of life

something that i can be proud of

more than holding a heritage

more like past generation wishes

past generation dirty dishes

hold me back and i am likely to become vicious

im sick of this

rabid

i attack

back track

im a train derailed

unstoppable

i hold a truth that shall prevail

invincible

tradition?

fallible opinions

i cant take anymore of the status quo

why are we held to a tradition to follow?

this new what of life isn’t a heartbeat.

change it up, live it up

don’t give a thought to a repeated cycle

be an anomaly…

Time For Me To Fly…

This is where I begin. 

This is where we end

Cease fire

Hold back

Clip

Pull the trigger.

Blow.

Blown.

Blown opportunity.

I told you to back off!

I said to respect my decision!

I said respect my heart’s desires. 

Understand where my happiness lies,

And what do you do???

Ignore.

Boom.

Blow up.

Immancipate

Yes. You assassinated

Any relationship we had gained back

Just leave me alone

Don’t talk to me.

I can’t even look at you, I can’t even talk to you

I can’t even think about you!!

I will blow a fuse.

Say exactly what I don’t mean,

Lose my testimony.

Lose my dignity and maturity.

I was the bigger person.

Not you.

Age is nothing but a number. Don’t be so ignorant.

Dummy.

Think I don’t know what you think?

I heard enough. And I still cut it short.

I heard it all, and you never finished your thoughts.

You think little before you speak, same as I.

But the difference is I left just in time.

I won’t be coming back for a while.

This time you couldn’t make me leave,

I left by choice, because​your words stabbed me

I had to go to my hospital.

My love.

Who actually loved me enough to mend hurt and pain.

I don’t need you.

This is where I begin.

This is where we end!

My Independence shall glow up

My Independence shall glow up!

My dependency falls by the wayside,

And we part ways.

Stay on your side.

Don’t come in my Lane.

Stay away from me, keep your mouth to yourself.

Focus on your own problems

Worry about your own life.

Leave me be.

It’s time for me to fly…

Bullied

I am socially awkward
And I am overweight
I don’t have any friends
And my hygiene isn’t that great

I am the one sitting alone
At the lunch table at school
Waiting on someone to come over and talk to me

All my life I have seen hate;
Pain and suffering.
Something has always hurt me.
I am not normal,
I’ve been told,
I’ve also been told I should’ve died long ago.

I trust no one;
I’ve learned I can’t
Because people bail on you,
And fail you,
Time and time again.

My whole life I’ve been bullied;
All I’ve ever wanted is to feel loved, cherished, and
To know someone will care about me.

Since I was born I’ve been treated awful
And until I die I will endure a struggle.

I’m always on the move
Each place I live is only temporary
And besides my mother who smokes and drinks every day
I don’t have any family.

All of this I felt until I met someone
Who fulfilled my desire to be loved;
And he even died for me at one point.

I’ve talked to him ever since I met him,
And even tho I can’t see him
I feel his presence.

He really changed every part about me,
Now when people bully me,
I feel bad for where they are heading.

My destination is heaven,
And theirs is nowhere.

They are going nowhere in life,
They live in the moment,
But when they are dead they will
look back at all the times
I witnessed to them,
And they will ask for help.

But it will be too late.

They all think I am ignorant
But really I am much smarter than them.
I think in the long run where my life will be
And I don’t want to head down the road of misery.
I am the bullied christian and this is my story.

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